ENLIST TODAY! Yes, it's more sexy nun war! Fetishman fetishman (who was so good they demoted him to the rank of fetishman), along with the first tea company and private lactose intolerance, are pitted against yet more filthy nuns, dirty habits (sorry), beans, barbed wire, brigadiers, booby traps and even the limitations of monochrome printing itself!

AND ALSO GET A BONUS 1ST TEA COMPANY I.D. CARD!

Every copy of fetishman #11 sold online also comes with a first tea company ID card with the rank of Senior Hatstand! So enlist today for your shiny shiny ID card and copy of fetishman issue #11!

Need more fetishman humour in your life? Want to get each and every issue hot offthe press every october and april?! Amused by the idea of an annual subscription that costs a fiver?!! Crave certainty in an uncertain world?!!! Easily intimidated into doing stuff by a liberal smattering of exclamation marks?!!!! Take two bottles into the shower???!! Your fretting is at an end!

For all of £ 5 for the UK (£ 6 for the EU and £ 7 for the rest of the world) you will get all of the following:

- the next two issues of fetishman, hot off the press, notably:
- - november 2010's issue 12!
- - april 2011's issue 13!
- an occasional email, with news and random whitterings!
- some fabulous fetishman "subscriber only" special offers.
- some other fabulous stuff.
- geof's empty promises!

The full set. The entire fetishman outpouring. The full extent of geof's cute collation of humour-y ruder-y. No fussing, just a big pile of comics. From the humble-y offensive issue #1 to the brown-ness of issue #11. Over 260 pages of not-quite-filth. And yes the photo is wrong, it was late. Shhh now. x

Is fetishman truly fetish? Is it enough for him to just run around in rubber righting sexy wrongs? Is he not good enough at being bad? Or is he bad enough to deserve a good 'un? Issue ten pits fetishman against his worst fears and a catalogue of fetishes, as well as cheeky gimps, bailiffs , quantitative easing, fetishman-opoly and the fetishman pound!

Space! A place to keep stuff like planets and that. And some time-travelling fetishman-y nonsense!

Yes, issue 9 boasts the unavoidable sci-fi-fest, packed as it is with bubble helmets, tentacles, expository dialogue, oblique references, attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion, rudery, smut, and even the fully armed and operational fetish rocket ship! Hell there's even the obligatory nuns. Nuns! woo!

"... it made me cry with laughter"
Ms. N. Wilkinson

With more urchins than you can shake a cock-linnet at, the "Victorians" issue casts fetishman as the age's second most-eminent sleuth: relentlessly failing to catch his arch-nemesis for 28 pages of innuendo, silliness, rubberiness, gutter-snipes, tea, fake adverts, chuff, and good old victorian values (like the advancement of pornography).

"... the new fetishman is the work of God sir!"
Mr. J. Smart

To celebrate the gift to comedy that is the 2008 Criminal Justice and Immigration Bill pray bear witness to issue7! the latest comic-like excuse for: more nuns; star wars references; inappropriate swearing; rubbery giggles; elderly scrotii; inexcusable barcodery; gimp-armed mecha; legitimate cannibalism and much much more!

NUNS!! FAAAAARSANDS OF 'EM! Will fetishman survive? Will lactose intolerant boy collect all the deathly hallows and defeat voldemort? What are next weeks lottery numbers? No idea, but the comic might help ease those lingering doubts. Especially if those lingering doubts need sexy nuns. x

Military patches from the bowels of my imagination. A subtly awesome way to be smutty without spoiling the aesthetic of your greatocat.

Declare fealty to tea! and look awesome.

The much-anticipated surprisingly-not-rude "Your country need you to drink more tea!" mug based on this faux Kitchener advert from fetishman #8.

An whole 90mm of white ceramic loveliness designed specifically for the purpose of shovelling 330ml of tea into your moosh without any of those embarassing "It's my teapot and I'll damn well drink from it if I want to!! Pass the milk would you dear?" moments.

What can i say? I like tea. You also like tea. You in fact need a proper, Stoke-on-Trent-made, 330 ml capacity, white earthenware mug bearing the letter "T" on one side and the dialogue "coffee?" "don't be disgusting" on the reverse. If only there was some way we could all be satisfied eh? hold on a second ...

Finally available on the web, the infamous fetishman "Fetish Warning Stickers": choose one out of the six elegantly simple designs that warn of a variety of conceivable Dominant-Submissive pairings. At 12cm/3" across (and laminated for reasons too base to surmise) now you too can attract wary and/or admiring glances from civilians and perverts alike.

Fetish Warning Sticker
posting to the UK: £ 2.50 each

Fetish Warning Sticker
posting internationally: £ 3.00 each